Magic America

I'm so happy now. My room has room (finally) with this new set-up I just bought; I've finally figured out how to turn off the annoying power on/off noise on my phone; I've gone somewhere; and everything is A-OK.

While in Winnipeg last week, I went into a Costco for the first time. My god, it's like that mega mart from The Simpsons, only real. It's an ugly-as-fuck warehouse with little to no organization at all - in essence, a chaotic mess of oversized products. Some of the prices on these huge-ass things are okay, but even when confronted with the best deal, you must consider that you have to pay AT LEAST $40 a year in order to shop there, which is just fucking weird (the different levels of membership even have different store hours. It's like we're living in India). The store I went to even had a little restaurant/stand thing, which served everything and did not require a membership to go to (it's basically its own entity).
The thing isn't as frightening as a Super Wal-Mart, but there's definitely something ugly about it. Unless you really need to have 20+ packs of toilet paper, 32-pack drinks, child-sized bags of chips, or any of the other pointless things...I don't see any real need to shop there. And like hell would I buy a computer or iPod at a horrible warehouse store.

CONSUMERISM TODAY.

Already Dead

It wasn't that long ago that I was complaining that there was no one to talk to online about TMNT: Smash Up. Now that I've seen both major communities devoted to the game, I want to go back to being alone. This is how my standards work.

I can't sleep because it's too hot in here. I have two fans on and a window cracked open and I'm still too hot. This is the downside of summer.

The upside of summer: I'm not too cold.

Just now I'm reading the comments to this, and it got me a-thinkin', about the omnipresent concept of 'dumb fun'.

Dumb fun does, in fact, exist, and it is completely alright. The problem, especially today (and especially considering the material discussed in the post, IE modern superhero comic events), is that they're almost uniformly all dumb and no fun. Postmodern audience awareness has made it so that silliness is now a detriment, and unfortunately that also has a negative effect on creativity. Plus, everyone now thinks they're a genius, and especially in the case of mainstream superhero comics, they are serious writers writing serious literature, even if that serious literature involves zombie Green Lanterns.
So, really, dumb fun is dead, or at least in hiding. In its place is dumb plodding self-aggrandizing tedium.

That's Not Me

A narcissistic aside: My message board alter ego is mentioned on this lovely 1UP.com podcast featuring lovely 1UP people (that's 6/22/2009), at about 25 minutes in (but you can wait while the good folks talk about other things, surely?). The ribbing I got I will take like a man.

So, with death in the news recently, I really must ask: when it comes to well-known people biting it, which was a better: this month, or this time last year?

June 2009 leads in sheer volume: David Carradine kills himself while jerking off to start off the summer, and then Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, and now Billy Mays (why is he mentioned alongside everyone else? Fuck if I know) all expire within days of each other. There really is no competition here.

But what about in quality? This designation is a bit more contentious. June 2008 had the deaths of three giants: Bo Diddley, George Carlin, and Stan Winston (he is a major figure for nerds, you see). The major ones, BD and Carlin, I'd say at least come close to equaling the entirety of this month's stiffs, they being examples of superior human beings. Sure, a lot more people are probably sad to see Jackson or McMahon go (and not to diminish the work of either, although Jackson was far far far far far far past his prime), but my personal bias (and objective fact) say that last year's stiffs can edge 'em out. Note: Billy Mays is a non-factor.

How about the shock factor? This also gives the edge to this month, because the thing about last year was that, while losing those people was incredibly sad, they were all old, and its not like we don't think anyone past 70 isn't as good as dead (Winston is the exception). So, while McMahon falls under this, the rest of them were still unexpected. Bonus points for Carradine's bizarre wanking death in Bangkok, of all places.

My decision? Well, most of the facts point to this month being the better of the two months worth of deaths, but my own personal opinions still point me in favour of last year. Surely, that is what will determine it for most people. Who can stay objective in a field such as this?

The End

You don't actually want me to talk about video games, do you? Good, because I won't. I'll take about tabletop games instead.

I've been reading card game rules for a while now, trying to find the intricacies of the game mechanics. The best ones always have that one ingenious thing about them, stuff like Lord of The Rings' Free Peoples/Shadow concept, or Doomtown's poker hand decisions, or even Shadowfist's general chaotic atmosphere. You don't necessarily need a great innovative mechanic to make your game good, but it does mean games of the 'Russian fist fighting' variety need to really try hard to be interesting. And some have: I mean, Magic did it, and Raw Deal did it. And for the unpretentious, there have been a few successful bare-bones games, like Pokemon. But the challenge is trying to make it seem like a game of its own, and not just a rehash of another game, or even worse, a game you could easily make just using a deck of playing cards.

As an example: one of the newer games on the block (and one with an innovative distribution method, something for game publishers to consider in modern times), Decipher's Fight Klub falls into RFF. How does it fair? It does have some interesting elements to it (some of them borrowed from Decipher's other games, even the names), and it is obviously going for the Raw Deal style. I can't say its the greatest game ever (or that it really lends itself to new ideas being implemented), but it should be enjoyable for those who pick it up, and I guess it works well with the new sale model it's trying. My only other complaint would be that the cards look like a photoshopped mess at times...a real shame considering the high quality of Decipher's card design in the past.

One After 909

I'll write something big about videogames when I feel like it.

I am sort of a repeated viewer of the Law & Order series. I remember that, not long ago, I wouldn't miss a single nightly rerun of the original series. And off and on, I will catch parts of the spin-offs. Oh lordy, the spin-offs.

I don't have much to say about Criminal Intent, as I watch it the least of the three, although the main cop (who is essentially a dumber version of Columbo) sticks with me for some reason. SVU is a whole other thing, though. It basically takes the L&O formula and never rests until there are at least a dozen insane plot twists during the hour. It's shit that MUST BE STACKED FOREVER.

The last episode I watched just kept changing directions for no reason whatsoever. First, we got the case, but oh no there's more to it! Than there's even more to it! Than this plot line comes in out of nowhere! And look, just to end it off, we got one more surprise! Combined with the generally preachy and hysterical nature of the 'ripped from the headline' approach generally gives it, and we got a show that is hilariously dumb, but never really boring, despite following formula to a T. And if that wasn't enough, we also have Ice-T getting in witty one-liners, when he's not going insane.

Consider this another guilty pleasure.

Over

Another year, another gaming convention. It's unfortunate my last game was canceled, but oh well. I tried some new things and some old things, and generally had a good time.

Oh, and just for fun, I'm going to list my ten favorite games I've played over my 9 years of conventioning.

10.Apples to Apples
9.Clay-o-Rama
8.Wrasslin'
7.Corruption
6.Cosmic Encounter
5.Munchkin
4.Illuminati
3.Toon
2.Talisman
1.Super Giant Monster Showdown

Record

Hurray for a week of new computer!

So this week is the annual gaming convention. I'm pumped for some Munchkin action, man! PUMPED.

And then next week is E3 2009: Return of the Nerd Circus. My new rule states that I am to expect nothing, preventing disappointment and increasing surprise. I'm going to stick to that. I will, though, be very very surprised if Nintendo announces a new Zelda. I have my reasons for this.

I was thinking of possibly doing one of those posts where people list music they listen to with a theme. I was going to post about the music I associated with the last few years. But then I realized that there were large gaps. Oh well, here's two of them:

2005: Monkey Gone to Heaven - The Pixies
2008: Friends - Ween

DR.E.A.M

This has probably waited too long, so not every detail is clear and thus it is less entertaining.

The dream took place at work...or at least a grocery store very similar to it. It actually kind of looked like IGA at times...anyway, the main thrust of it was that the last episode of a TV show I liked, which I'm pretty sure was Sealab 2021 (which is funny, because that show ended about two years ago). There were TVs strewn about on the racks that I used to watch it...and it didn't look much like Sealab, to be honest. There was something else about it, too, that made it a must-see for me, although I can't remember what that was, exactly.
I also wandered the store, finding dream strangeness about. No specific examples of it that I can remember. See, I told you waiting so long has sucked all the fun out of this.

But yeah, first new 'major' dream in a while.

Prediction + Health Update

I seem to be getting sick again. Maybe it's the H1N1 virus (man, what a 133t name). There has been one reported case around here. Of course, it was in a child from a school I haven't been to since grade 8, so unless it's diffused into the populace at a much more rapid rate than health officials knew, that seems unlikely. More likely I'm coming down with a common disease. It feels like the same shit I got last fall. Which wouldn't be too good, because that sick time sucked, but it still better than OMG FORIN PANDEMIC.

***************************************************

To update my game prediction posts from before (if you haven't stopped reading by now, DO IT. STOP READING.)

For Punch-Out!!, we have a few more confirmations. We have actual footage of Piston Hondo and Great Tiger now. Also, the ESRB website description pretty much comes out and says Super Macho Man and Soda Popinski are in the game, which fits my list. Current reviews point to 'a few' nods to Super Punch-Out!!, which means that someone else from that game will show up alongside Bear Hugger (I'm still going with Dragon Chan on that).

With Piston Hondo, though, I must take off one my original list, and it'll probably be original final boss. The final boss seems to be silhouetted on the web site (why else would the one unfilled profile be there since day 1?), and it looks like...a buffed up Mr. Sandman? That would be odd.


Now, Smash Up. Nothing big, but the current post on the developer blog says that "the characters all utilize a weapon of some sort", which would mean the characters in the game would have to have some sort of weapon. It's a pretty open phrase, I mean anything could be used as a weapon. I don't think it hurts the stuff I had in my prediction post, but its something to consider.

This is also not important

DON'T READ THIS OR YOU'LL GO BLIND.

Recap: TMNT: Smash Up is a new fighting game coming out this year featuring the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, developed by Game Arts, some of the folks behind Super Smash Bros. Brawl. It looks to play like Smash Bros. (as one might have noticed from the SUPER SUBTLE reference in the title), but has enough of its own ideas so it won't be labeled a complete rip-off. It looks and sounds surprisining promising.

Now, this being a crossover/fanservice game (to which I am somewhat partial) based on material I have a reasonable amount of knowledge about, it makes sense then that I would start speculating on stuff in the game. Specifically the characters.

The developers have made tons of tittering hints about characters, talking about how the game is 'set to please fans of all eras of the turtles' (the game coinciding with the 25th anniversary of the franchise) and how we'll see characters we'll expect and others we never saw coming. Very vague, but it's a start.

So Who is Already In It?
Of course, you can't a TMNT game without the turtles. So Leonardo, Raphael, Michelangelo, and Donatello are all already on board. So is Splinter, another no one should be surprised by. Finally, an early interview with the developers pretty much confirmed Shredder, not that we needed anyone to confirm the main antagonist of series being a character in a fanservice game for that series.

Who is the Most Likely?
TMNT is a franchise that has had many different components over the years, each one its own little universe. There's the original Mirage comics, the 80s cartoon, the late 80s/early 90s Archie comics, the movies (which don't really feel all that coherent and maybe shouldn't all be counted as one thing), and the new cartoon. Considering that this is supposed to be a game for all fans, I'm thinking the best place to start would be to find common ground between the iterations.

Not that hard, really. Which characters appear across all the versions? There are a few, and they would probably constitute the 'characters you know' thing the developers being interviewed have mentioned.

The shoe-ins, that I'd say need no further speculation, are Casey Jones and Karai. Appear across multiple forms, are always major characters, and are perfect for a fighting game. There ya' go.

The other recurring characters: April O'Neil, Baxter Stockman, Fugitoid, Rat King, and Leatherhead. Each one has their own sets of helping and hindering factors (Will April get in based on the new movie, Fugitoid is mentioned on the main site for the game, will they include Leatherhead even with a giant alligator as a hazard, etc.), but as a Turtles fanservice game, they seem to be the best starting selection of characters.

I also wouldn't be surprised to see a 'generic' character or two in there, like a Foot Ninja or Triceraton, considering how prominent they are. Maybe even an Utrom.

And Some Wild Guesses
From the sounds of things, some of the character choices may follow an idea I had when the game was first announced; that is, pull characters from different sectors of the franchise. This could supply the 'hardcore for-fan' characters they keep alluding to. But who?

This is a tad bit harder. The only clues we can possibly get is from the fact that the character selections are being made by Mirage. Who would Mirage pick? I don't know. From reading the blogs of the guys, I get the idea that they were behind some of the characters featured in the Archie comics and toyline, so some of those guys could show up. But that's probably wrongheaded.

Hard to say, really. I would say that if anyone from another (as in not Mirage, which is where I suppose most of the characters will come from) form shows up, it might be someone like Slash or Ray Fillet, characters who might gel with the others better (the former more than the latter).

Some people have also brought up the possibility that they could include Usagi Yojimbo, which is certainly a possibility. The only thing with that is that Usagi is owned by another indy comic artist who 'lent' his creation to the series a few times out of friendship. There's still a decent chance for him (he'd certainly fall under the 'never expected' banner), but he's a different scenario.


I'm glad to get that off my chest.

@_@

Due to Youtube's gang of miscreants, I've found myself exposed to far too much Hello Kitty-related things as of recent. It's messing with my mind, man!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Adventures_of_Hello_Kitty_%26_Friends

Although the show is aimed at children between the ages of three to ten, it is popular for men and women of all ages.

YOU DO NOT FILL ME WITH CONFIDENCE!

This is not important

This post should not be read. This is for my own reference.

Alright, it's for a bit more than that. But only if you care about the subject matter, and I'm sure a lot of you don't:

My predictions for the opponents in the new Punch-Out!!

(Italics means they are already confirmed. Everyone else is my own guess.)

Glass Joe
Von Kaiser
Disco Kid
King Hippo
Bear Hugger
Don Flamenco
Bald Bull
Great Tiger
Soda Popinski
Dragon Chan
Mr. Sandman
Super Macho Man
All-New Final Boss

UPDATE: Not even a day and Internet news fucks me up the ass. I hate you, Piston Honda.

Hidy Hole

This week is a non-school week. I hope to get things done. Also, Street Fighter.

I've always been thinking of finishing the two other parts of this, just in time for the one year anniversary of the game's release. Boy, doing something to celebrate a year since the release of one game sure sounds pathetic, but you must remember that this game in particular basically absorbed my life for almost two years. Wait, that only makes me sound even more pathetic. I have nowhere to go...

Wow, I can't believe Conan leaves this week. It just seemed to creep up on us all. I don't know how to feel; I've been watching this show for 8 years now, and now it's going to be gone, replaced by a retard pandering to an audience of idiots. Okay, at best, it could just be transferred to a different time slot (where I'd miss it due to work most of the time).

What a strange time we live in.