Friday, March 14, 2008

uh yeah

I think you know what's been going down lately. If any of you loyal readers would like to partake in some Smashing with yours truly, say so in the comments and we'll work something out.

What about those recent pics of the Watchmen movie (I don't feel like linking, and it's not it'll be hard for you top find them)? For the most part...they are okay. Rorschach, the Comedian, and Silk Spectre look as they should (albeit, how can one screw up the Rorschach design, short of turning it green and giving it a thousand belts or some stupid crap like that). Nite Owl...looks a little to Batman-ish for my tastes. Ozymandias' rubber costume is rather ridiculous. Just Doc Manhattan left to either make me wary or make me excited (I don't think I should avoid the movie, even if it does look underwhelming. Fanboy regulation, you see). No matter, though. The main obstacles for this being a successful adaptation is in the script.

Speaking of designs, I like to make of the fun of the characters in Kingdom Hearts. I played through the first one a while ago, had a decent time with it. but can understand why others didn't. No matter how much I like the game itself, though, the main characters are insanely insipid.

Sora would appear to be the conventional Square protagonist, if not for the clown shoes and penchant to be somewhat happy. Still, spiky hair? Check. Love interest with the personality of a stump? Check. Dull-haired rival with uninteresting motivations? Oh, I'm checking that twice. Speaking of which...

Riku: So boring, it'll be a challenge writing a full paragraph about him without falling asleep at the keyboard. He's not just a stock RPG character, he's a stock character in all forms of Japanese fiction. Why is that? Why must there always be one like him? At least give him like, red hair or something. Spice things up a bit.

And now...THE GIRLFRIEND. Aw, Kairi. For most of the first game, you were a vegetable. A vegetable both retarded protagonist and his secret butt buddy/rival/friend/villain/anti-hero/worthless character want to fuck, you can tell. Which is fairly disturbing on it's own. Except, it's not, because Kairi has as much personality in a coma that she does awake and alert. In fact, she may have more. At the very least, she serves a greater purpose during her coma as the human macguffin than she does any other time as the character nobody gives a damn about. Unfortunately, unlike her template Aeris, she doesn't get impaled at any point in the game.

So there's my rant about a 6-year-old game. Never played the sequel, didn't like the first one enough to really want to, TRON-inclusion aside. It introduced a bunch of black-robed characters, who I'm sure are developed studies of the human psyche. Or maybe one of them is basically anime Trapjaw.

So there you go, I deliver once again.

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1 Comments:

At 5:24 PM, Anonymous Judy! said...

omg u didn't call her "Aerith" u screwed up her name lol u r teh idoit.

Yeah, I hate people like that..

 

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